House Overwhelm

I think I may lose my mind through this whole process of moving and we’ve barely started. We are still waiting for the relocation package to be finalized and to us in writing.


My husband would be happy with that being months down the road, me not so much. The longer it takes to get to the moving part of this relocation, the more time I have to spend apart from my husband while he commutes to Ohio and back at his company’s beckon call.

It is so easy to look at houses for sale and daydream about the other side of this process. I have found a couple houses that would be absolutely perfect for us. That is the fun part, the one and only fun part of this.

Yesterday, we walked through the house room by room and made lists of everything that needs to be done. This is stuff that has to be done before we can have an appraiser or real estate agent walk through our house.

Keeping in mind, each room has a page and it is larger print, I still have 12 pages. 12!!!!!!!!! I don’t even know where to start. This is where I am starting today. Putting my frustration into words, while I cry my sad and angry tears over a cup of vanilla chai. I seriously don’t know what else to do at the moment.

I am definitely having a “my bath tub is going to fall through the floor” moment here.

We have done a decent job since our crisis last year with the bathroom. Once we got the bathroom fixed/remodeled, we slowly did things around the house as our budget allowed. We live on a very tight budget, not much to spare.

Mid last year, my husband lost one of his extra jobs. Since then, we don’t travel and have nothing planned. We have literally sunk our extra money into slowly fixing what was left to do to the house. Our plan, save, fix, save, fix, save, fix….

This relocation thing puts all our plans aside and puts us into semi-hyper speed in doing things we hadn’t planned or budgeted for at all.

I’m just being incredibly real here….

I’ve made some stupid mistakes. I got us in a financial bind. This relocation is going to provide us some relief that we have worked on for a very long time. Unfortunately, the relief will come on the other side of it and we will still be on the painfully tight budget until then.

It all seems too big for me. I know truths that apply to even something as trivial as this. God will supply everything we need to do everything He has called us to do. There is nothing impossible. God will make a way. But, I know I need God to help my unbelieving heart. The weight of it all feels big enough to crush me.