1. steady persistence in a course of action, a purpose, a state, etc., especially in spite of difficulties, obstacles, or discouragement.
The Internet makes it incredibly easy to find the definition of anything. Google a word and seconds later you know exactly what it means.
Why can't it be so easy to find the answer when you come to a crossroad in perseverance? To proceed on or back away, know it wasn't the right road for you? Why can't you google that?
I'm at one of those points in my life with a particular thing.
This thing, this place in my life has brought great amount of pain to me. It's been a long, long road. Sure, there has been some good along the way. Just not enough to supersede the bad.
But here I am at a point where I have to make a decision...go all in or get all out.
It's not one of those decisions that are circumstantial or are made for you. The weight of the decision is fully on me.
Could going all in and not bailing bring more pain and consternation? Could it cause me great regret, sometimes daily? Will it be hard? Am I fearful? Yes, Yes, Yes, AND YES!
Is it the right thing to do? Could there be great rewards? Could I find my hearts desire where I least expect it? Is there potential for this to seem like just a bump in the road at some time in the future? Yes, Yes, Yes AND YES!
But how do you press on? How to do you force yourself to focus on the positive possibilities instead of living with the negative ones?
I'm empty. I'm weak. I'm vulnerable. I'm tired. I'm afraid.
It's true...the right thing isn't always the easiest thing and the easiest thing is often the wrong thing.
I'm still unsure what I need to do with this particular thing. I do know that I can't continue to on, can't persevere through this alone. Can't do it. I'm empty, weak, vulnerable, tired and afraid. Even trying to do it alone is a recipe for failure if I choose to move forward.
Praying for you Monica... Always!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Candace.
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