Young Ladies

In November, I was given the opportunity to work with some very talented, special women.  We were tasked with creating an event for women of our church.

That might sound like a simple thing to do, but it isn't.  When you bring women together, all with different backgrounds, lives, likes and dislikes, there is going to be various preferences.

This group certainly went through a time of learning how to communicate with each other and a time of learning respect for each other's differences.

Through all of the ups and downs, big ideas and realistic planning, the event came and went.  I would say it was a huge success.  The feedback was great from those who attended.  But that wasn't what made it a success to me.  Those planning it, who had never worked together before on a project of this size, made it through with smiles on their faces. 

We were all glad it was over because of the energy it takes to put on an event of this size.  But I bet each of the ladies would say it was a joy to plan.

Through the planning of this event, I felt a change in my own heart. 

I haven't always had patience with young people.  I haven't ever found myself wanting to be around younger people.  The lack of maturity that some young people exhibit has always been difficult for me to accept and spend time around. 

This event solidified a change in me.  For the past year, I found myself wanting to reach out to the younger ladies in our church.  On occasion, I would send them an email to encourage them or just pray for them as I thought about them at random times. 

Being around this spectacular group of young women made me care even more for the young ladies of our church.  While I never shared this with them, I could see myself in so much of them.  Whether it was juggling work and home or school and work, I could identify with where they were at in life. 

I kick myself for not sharing this with them, but hearing them talk about life was the first time ever in our church when I felt like my life experiences could have prepared me to walk with anyone through anything.

Despite trying to fight it, I believe God laid that age group of women on my heart.  I find myself wanting to encourage them or pray for them.  If you know me well at all, you know that's not like me.

There really isn't a need or place for me to do anything with this, especially in our church.  Our church is great with supporting this age group with a list of women who want to walk with this age group.  So, I'll sit silently cheering them on and praying for them as I randomly hear of their various needs.

Who Are You?

That is the moment every loved one of a dementia patient dreads, but knows will come.

The past month has been a tough one for my husband and probably his family. 

I am only guessing about his family, because they seem to have some communication malfunctions.  Being slightly on the outside of things, I can see this for what it is.  Two parents, 4 siblings, 4 grandkids, 1 son-in-law and 2 daughters-in-law are all trying to process this ugly thing called dementia.  Everyone acts out of their own perceptions and fears.  Some of that comes out in very hateful conversations or just a lack of all communication and all of this while trying to live through their own lives.

We could have only hoped that the past month would be status quo, but that wasn't to be.

The month started off with a birthday party for my husband's sister.  His mom had a hard time keeping his sister and neice's names correct.  That was hard for him to see.  He came home from the party deflated, but I know he was thankful for the time he spent with his family.

In the following week, we received a save the date for his oldest neice who is getting married in Las Vegas in February 2013.  A difficult realization set in as we both thought through the idea that his mom might not be able to mentally capable or phyiscally able to travel to see her first grandchild get married. 

During the past week, things have been a bit tense for my husband.  His mom was hospitalized for a short time with dehydration.  We aren't sure if she had a virus or if her medication caused her problems. 

What we learned was that when someone has dementia, they are not reliable in communicating health problems and cannot be reliable for overseeing their own medications.  Through a conversation with the Neurologist's nurse, it was suggested that it was time for the family to consider adding a home health nurse for continued care. 

Given his sister's frame of mind and increased stress level, a home health nurse is a wonderful suggestion.  His mom is taking medications which are statistically given to late stage dementia patients.  Those patients are usually in care facilities where the medications can be monitored.  A home health nurse would make it possible for her to live at home longer, which will make everyone happier.

I believe it is fear of the unknown variables that are causing the siblings to not communicate well with one another.  I wish they could see that this is a time to forge solid bonds with each other.  I hate the idea that any of them could look back on this time with regrets.

This Friday will be the next trip to the neurologist.  This will bring a change in medication.  I hope the doctor will offer some support for the family.  As someone who loves each one of these people dearly and someone who is painfully watching them all hurt, I hope they will be encouraged to seek support from others who have dealt with this awful disease.

Abbreviated

Wowee Zowee...

I can't believe it's been a month since I've graced the pages of blogosphere.  Life is life.  My life has been partially consumed by working with some amazing young ladies at church to plan an event.  Partially consumed by being sick, a time I'd rather forget after having high fever hallucinations.  Partially consumed by the ongoing issues with my mother-in-law.  All of them could have a post to themselves.

But I would rather share a thought about something that has increasingly weighed on my mind lately.

Abbreviations

My favorite bible verse is Romans 12:9.  However, when I see it written as Rom 12:9, I cringe.  In fact, I cringe any time I see a book of the bible abbreviated.

I know you might be thinking that I am a bit knit-picky and it is a matter of personal preference.  Actually, at the core of this...it is all about respect.

As I learn about how the bible came to be, I am amazed at what it took to produce the book in my hands.  Words said by God; carried down through generations; etched into stones; copied and recopied; debated; translated.  It is breathtaking to think of the trail from God's mouth to my hands. 

Think through that one more time...the words from God's mouth have traveled to you through the very book in your hands.  No other book has ever been printed as often or verified as carefully as the bible.  When you think through that, not only should that cause a moment of awe but ignite a respect deeper than you can explain.

Do you understand why I cringe when I see anything from the bible abbreviated?

I asked a friend once why she thought it was ok to abbreviate the books of the bible.  Her response was because she had seen parents, Sunday school teachers and pastors do it that way for years.  My response to that was...why does that make it ok?

Don't get me wrong, I feel this way across the board.  Anything which deserves respect, I believe deserves the time and energy to be spelled out fully.  I often see friends put comments on facebook about spending time with their "fam" or "hubs."  If you love and respect your family or spouse, I believe they deserve to be called by their respected name.

Whether you are wife, teacher, husband, daughter, son, leader, follower, I firmly believe that your respect of something should be shown in the way you spell it out.  My hope is that family and the bible would mean enough to you that you would pass it on to the generations in a respected way.