This is probably the last big bounce post. It's probably time to start seeing everything as normal, everyday life.
I'm not going to lie, it's been a rough transition and the adjustment has not been immediate.
We were well loved on the first few days we were here. The neighbors left us a huge basket of cleaning supplies and wonderful note welcoming us to the area. It included important numbers and a little about themselves. So helpful! Said neighbors are so sweet! The wife was over last week and walked through the house. She got teary seeing how different and clean it looked. That made me feel good.
One of our neighbors is a man my husband works with and his wife. He came a couple days to check on us and even mowed our yard the day after our stuff arrived. His wife brought us our first home cooked meal that weekend, that we savored for a couple days.
Our real estate agent and her husband have been so good to us. They answer questions, helped us figure out little things we didn't understand like the water softener. They had cleaners clean and trash companies haul off the massive amount of trash. They have been awesome! She definitely went above and beyond.
On the downside, we've struggled mightily. The night after we took possession of the house, I was so overwhelmed and upset. I cried and begged my husband to take me home. He very kindly reminded me that this was home now. It didn't feel like it. My friends weren't here. My stuff wasn't yet here. I didn't like it and I wanted to go. I love that he was strong at that very moment. Besides that one night, I've not had any major melt downs.
My husband, however, has and quite regularly. I feel so terrible for him. He was close to his family, they aren't here. Even though he works for the same company, he's had to go in as a new employee, learning new faces and a new job. His work space is different, his home space is different. In addition, he's having to learn how to do life without multiple jobs. So much of his extra time was tied up in other jobs that he never had down time. Now he has more than he knows what to do with. Everything is different and everything is hard. As his wife, my heart aches for him. I know he longs for something familiar and I can't give that to him in big enough ways. I know he feels forgotten and lost a lot of the time. His struggle is driving me to prayer more than ever.
We have not had much luck finding a church yet. I know after only three Sundays, I shouldn't be discouraged yet. However, our options are so limited here and nothing has been even remotely worth a second visit. Again, our faith is being tested in big ways. Church is how we are going to build community, especially for me.
There have been adjustments for me that have been great. I have become more focused on just being a wife. There isn't much else to do in the middle of no where. I do the majority of the laundry. There are rarely dirty dishes in the sink. Dinner is always cooked at home and I usually make sure my husband has something ready for lunch. The bed is always made and the house is usually clean. I feel energized by having the windows open and feeling the cool breeze.
Things are still so different in the area. We are in a town of 800 people and we live about 3 miles away from it in the country. The people are different. They live a slower paced life without fear. I was shocked to learn that most people don't like their doors. You don't see people speeding or road rage. People are far more generous here too. No kidding. In the next town over, they have some massive charities that serve people from all over this region.
Shopping is not the same. There is Walmart and a couple grocery stores. We can get what we need, but not necessarily what we are used to having. The cost of groceries are about 25% cheaper, but gas is about 25% more expensive. We don't have a lot of options for dining either. We have your basic fast food places, although not a Sonic anywhere. The only chain sit down dining place we have is Bob Evans. Needless to say, we eat at home almost every meal except once or twice a week. I'm a bit sad. Some friends gave us restaurant gift cards before we left and we don't have a way to use them.
I've tried to develop a routine. Cleaning Monday. Laundry Tuesday and Friday. Grocery shopping Friday. Saturday we try to visit a larger city for things we need.
We had a couple groups of people tell us they were going to try to visit over the upcoming holiday weekend. We were totally excited to see some familiar faces. Both have changed their plans. I think we both long to be with familiar people who love us. It's hard being in a place where you know nobody and haven't built any relationships.
Each day does get a little easier. But, it is easy to feel lost. It's easy to feel forgotten. It's impossible to know when those things start to get better. For now, we take it one day at a time. Hopefully the days get a little easier a little more often.
Thursday, May 22, 2014
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
The Big Bounce: The House
The third and final part of our move is the house.
To start, our house in KC should close in the next 10 days. Even since moving, we have had to jump through one hurdle after another with it. We've had to continue pouring money into, money we weren't prepared to spend. Lord willing, it will be off our plate by the end of May.
Our new house, well we've had some surprises with it too.
I believe I mentioned that the previous owners trashed it between the contract acceptance and leaving. Let me just run down the list of obscure things.
1. There was a dog door that was never disclosed and was completely hidden during showing, inspection and appraisal. Not in a door, but in the side of the wall. They didn't even bother to finish it. They completely lied on the disclosure, saying a fish tank had leaked and they had repaired but never repainted.
2. Trash. Oh my word! We cleaned out 2 dumpsters full, 8 additional bags and a mountain of trash. We were disgusted, but didn't know at the time just how much had already been cleaned out. The neighbors, the selling agent and our agent had already walked through mulitiple times and cleaned out trash. Holy cow!
3. General condition. The walls were all trashed and had hundreds of nails in them. There wasn't any surface in the house that wasn't scuffed or ruined in some way or another. In addition, there was mold growing on the walls. After some consideration, we hired a professional painter. He did the entire house in about 5 half days. We didn't have the extra money, but it was worth our mental well being. Thankfully, our agent here is such a sweetheart. She hired professional cleaners to clean every inch of the place before our stuff came. What a blessing that was.
4. Appliances. The man who used to live here was an appliance repairman. Repair he did not! In fact in his last month here, he exchanged or took working parts out of the stove, fridge, dishwasher, gas fireplace and hot tub. That has left us with a very expensive mess. We only have one working burner on the stove and the oven doesn't work well at all. Everything needs to be repaired and quickly, but we are out of funds. Ugh!
5. Carpet. We vacuumed and shampooed the carpet everyday until our furniture arrived. So glad we did. It was gross. The carpet is less than 6 months old and will probably have to be replaced in the next year.
6. Drainage. On the disclosure, they said the yard had been regraded to prevent water from going into the crawl space. That was a big fat lie! The regrading that was done was in the ditches only. That was done by the county because the idiot who lived here kept rolling his mower in the ditch.
7. Structurally. The inspection standards in Ohio are not the same as Missouri. Structurally, this place is ok, but there are problems. There are places that are going to have to be replaced in the flooring. The septic system is just a mess. The gutter drainage is beyond what we can even figure out right now. My husband has started to dig it up, but no clue what to do. We do know something has to happen, the gutters don't drain. And, we are acutely aware of that since we've only had 2 days without rain since we moved here.
I am sure there is more. My goodness, it's never a good sign when the neighbors say they will have to tell us all about it this summer over drinks by the bonfire.
Despite it all, this is home. We've unpacked the majority of stuff. We've decorated. It is starting to feel like home a little more each day. We still have a lot of things to go through in the garage, most of it is being donated.
The move is done. The house in KC is about done. Now, the adjustment.
To start, our house in KC should close in the next 10 days. Even since moving, we have had to jump through one hurdle after another with it. We've had to continue pouring money into, money we weren't prepared to spend. Lord willing, it will be off our plate by the end of May.
Our new house, well we've had some surprises with it too.
I believe I mentioned that the previous owners trashed it between the contract acceptance and leaving. Let me just run down the list of obscure things.
1. There was a dog door that was never disclosed and was completely hidden during showing, inspection and appraisal. Not in a door, but in the side of the wall. They didn't even bother to finish it. They completely lied on the disclosure, saying a fish tank had leaked and they had repaired but never repainted.
2. Trash. Oh my word! We cleaned out 2 dumpsters full, 8 additional bags and a mountain of trash. We were disgusted, but didn't know at the time just how much had already been cleaned out. The neighbors, the selling agent and our agent had already walked through mulitiple times and cleaned out trash. Holy cow!
3. General condition. The walls were all trashed and had hundreds of nails in them. There wasn't any surface in the house that wasn't scuffed or ruined in some way or another. In addition, there was mold growing on the walls. After some consideration, we hired a professional painter. He did the entire house in about 5 half days. We didn't have the extra money, but it was worth our mental well being. Thankfully, our agent here is such a sweetheart. She hired professional cleaners to clean every inch of the place before our stuff came. What a blessing that was.
4. Appliances. The man who used to live here was an appliance repairman. Repair he did not! In fact in his last month here, he exchanged or took working parts out of the stove, fridge, dishwasher, gas fireplace and hot tub. That has left us with a very expensive mess. We only have one working burner on the stove and the oven doesn't work well at all. Everything needs to be repaired and quickly, but we are out of funds. Ugh!
5. Carpet. We vacuumed and shampooed the carpet everyday until our furniture arrived. So glad we did. It was gross. The carpet is less than 6 months old and will probably have to be replaced in the next year.
6. Drainage. On the disclosure, they said the yard had been regraded to prevent water from going into the crawl space. That was a big fat lie! The regrading that was done was in the ditches only. That was done by the county because the idiot who lived here kept rolling his mower in the ditch.
7. Structurally. The inspection standards in Ohio are not the same as Missouri. Structurally, this place is ok, but there are problems. There are places that are going to have to be replaced in the flooring. The septic system is just a mess. The gutter drainage is beyond what we can even figure out right now. My husband has started to dig it up, but no clue what to do. We do know something has to happen, the gutters don't drain. And, we are acutely aware of that since we've only had 2 days without rain since we moved here.
I am sure there is more. My goodness, it's never a good sign when the neighbors say they will have to tell us all about it this summer over drinks by the bonfire.
Despite it all, this is home. We've unpacked the majority of stuff. We've decorated. It is starting to feel like home a little more each day. We still have a lot of things to go through in the garage, most of it is being donated.
The move is done. The house in KC is about done. Now, the adjustment.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
The Big Bounce: The Move
So, on April 28 (just three short months after finding out this move was only a possibility), we made final preparations for our move.
We did final things in the house. Take things off the walls, repair every little nail hole we could find, repaint, etc. We went down the list and made sure everything was done.
In the weeks before, we made our moving plans with a local company. In addition, we had two wonderful friends who would take time off work to be with the packers and the movers. God bless them!
We had to do things like change our address and make a plan with our relators there and finalize closing plans.
We woke up to rain the morning of April 29th. We packed the truck the best we could, loaded our brood of dogs and said a tearful goodbye to our home. Honestly, it felt like we were leaving a piece of ourselves.
Maybe it was the dreary rain or maybe it was just the raw emotion, there wasn't a moment of our long trip that felt ok to either of us. I don't think we've ever had such an emotional road trip. We drove in rain about 3/4 of the trip, with the rain stopping only through Illinois.
It was the beginning and an end. We took turns crying, being excited, being scared, encouraging the other and a feeling a lot displaced.
After our GPS took us on a 30 minute extra drive through a winding forest, hilly road, we finally made it to our new home at about 9:30 that night. Driving without stopping, the trip is about 10.5 hours. With three dogs and a husband with a peanut bladder, it took about 12.5 hours.
We did our final walk through in the house. We were so disgusted by what we saw, but I will get to that in the next post.
For three nights, we stayed at the only hotel in the next town over. Ick! That's all I can say.
Wednesday morning, we signed and took possession of our new home. We spent the next several hours driving from one utility company to another transferring service to our name.
Meanwhile, our stuff was being packed. We had packed up a good deal of the excess stuff in preparation and to better show our house. However, we had left all the bigger and more fragile items.
Six young men spent about 10 hours wrapping, securing, taping and packing the rest of our stuff.
We were told to take all valuables with us. Either faith or ignorant bliss left me feeling secure to leave most everything except a few jewelry items, wedding photos and important paperwork. However, after arriving in Ohio, that STUFF started to feel like a part of us. Anxiety overload would soon set in.
At 8 am on Thursday morning, the young men would return to finish packing and begin loading two box moving trucks and the car. At about 8 pm, they finally finished.
At 9 pm, the owner called to confirm they were starting the drive at about 9:30 pm. Two of them would make the journey to Ohio. We spent most of Friday a bit nervous and anxious for the missing pieces of us to arrive.
At 8 pm on Friday evening, the caravan arrived. We were quite impressed that the 2 of them unloaded every bit of our stuff in 6 hours.
By about 11 pm, we were all tired and losing track of what went where. By 2 am, everything was being put in the barn. Something we would later regret.
Despite our exhaustion, we were sad to see the movers go. They were our last face to face contact with anyone remotely familiar.
But, we would head to bed and try to get some sleep before tackling a lifetime of stuff in boxes.
We did final things in the house. Take things off the walls, repair every little nail hole we could find, repaint, etc. We went down the list and made sure everything was done.
In the weeks before, we made our moving plans with a local company. In addition, we had two wonderful friends who would take time off work to be with the packers and the movers. God bless them!
We had to do things like change our address and make a plan with our relators there and finalize closing plans.
We woke up to rain the morning of April 29th. We packed the truck the best we could, loaded our brood of dogs and said a tearful goodbye to our home. Honestly, it felt like we were leaving a piece of ourselves.
Maybe it was the dreary rain or maybe it was just the raw emotion, there wasn't a moment of our long trip that felt ok to either of us. I don't think we've ever had such an emotional road trip. We drove in rain about 3/4 of the trip, with the rain stopping only through Illinois.
It was the beginning and an end. We took turns crying, being excited, being scared, encouraging the other and a feeling a lot displaced.
After our GPS took us on a 30 minute extra drive through a winding forest, hilly road, we finally made it to our new home at about 9:30 that night. Driving without stopping, the trip is about 10.5 hours. With three dogs and a husband with a peanut bladder, it took about 12.5 hours.
We did our final walk through in the house. We were so disgusted by what we saw, but I will get to that in the next post.
For three nights, we stayed at the only hotel in the next town over. Ick! That's all I can say.
Wednesday morning, we signed and took possession of our new home. We spent the next several hours driving from one utility company to another transferring service to our name.
Meanwhile, our stuff was being packed. We had packed up a good deal of the excess stuff in preparation and to better show our house. However, we had left all the bigger and more fragile items.
Six young men spent about 10 hours wrapping, securing, taping and packing the rest of our stuff.
We were told to take all valuables with us. Either faith or ignorant bliss left me feeling secure to leave most everything except a few jewelry items, wedding photos and important paperwork. However, after arriving in Ohio, that STUFF started to feel like a part of us. Anxiety overload would soon set in.
At 8 am on Thursday morning, the young men would return to finish packing and begin loading two box moving trucks and the car. At about 8 pm, they finally finished.
At 9 pm, the owner called to confirm they were starting the drive at about 9:30 pm. Two of them would make the journey to Ohio. We spent most of Friday a bit nervous and anxious for the missing pieces of us to arrive.
At 8 pm on Friday evening, the caravan arrived. We were quite impressed that the 2 of them unloaded every bit of our stuff in 6 hours.
By about 11 pm, we were all tired and losing track of what went where. By 2 am, everything was being put in the barn. Something we would later regret.
Despite our exhaustion, we were sad to see the movers go. They were our last face to face contact with anyone remotely familiar.
But, we would head to bed and try to get some sleep before tackling a lifetime of stuff in boxes.
Thursday, May 8, 2014
The Big Bounce: The Preparation
We finally have internet. YAY!
I obviously have some catching up to do.
The Preparation
The Move
The Home
I will see if I can get it all in just a few posts.
The Preparation.
It should probably be called Operation Preparation H. Seriously, a pain in the ass!
There is so much to do in preparing to move.
There are just logistic things. Because we were headed into a mess of a house, we had to leave a few days before our stuff. We had to find people to sit for hours with the packers and movers. Then, we had to find some friends who share our white glove ideas on cleaning to make the house presentable after our stuff was gone.
Thankfully, we did. All is good in that area.
In the weeks and days prior to moving, we had to do all the necessities. We had to plan for mail forwarding and start changing addresses with various companies. We had to secure insurance on our new home. We even had the non-essential things to do like find satellite service and internet service.
We had to figure out what to pack in the truck and what to leave behind. I guess I should say, fight over what would come with us and what would come with the movers. We had very different ideas of what was essential.
There were last minutes doctor visits, prescription refills and vet visits. Last minute banking and planning. We had to cancel services at the previous house and make some minor repairs from shelving and curtain rods we took down.
It was a crazy week prior to leaving.
We did have some extremely bittersweet times before we left.
We had a Saturday afternoon cookout with the majority of Kent's family. It was great to have that time. We needed that time. Leaving family and friends was the hardest part of this move. We loved having some concentrated time before we left. We even had a chance to have a nice dinner with my little brother and his wife before we left.
On the Friday before we left, some sweet friends threw us a going away party. It was amazing. We were so surprised by the number of people who came to wish us well and say goodbye. It was humbling. I don't think either one of us realized just how many friends we had.
Much to our surprise, many of our friends showered us with love and gifts or gift cards. We set and read each card with giant tears flowing. I'll explain in one of the next posts, but the gifts and gift cards have blessed us beyond words.
Honestly, it was all of the encouragement and time we had with friends and family that has gotten us through. We know we have a huge group of supporters who are praying for us and wishing us all the best.
I obviously have some catching up to do.
The Preparation
The Move
The Home
I will see if I can get it all in just a few posts.
The Preparation.
It should probably be called Operation Preparation H. Seriously, a pain in the ass!
There is so much to do in preparing to move.
There are just logistic things. Because we were headed into a mess of a house, we had to leave a few days before our stuff. We had to find people to sit for hours with the packers and movers. Then, we had to find some friends who share our white glove ideas on cleaning to make the house presentable after our stuff was gone.
Thankfully, we did. All is good in that area.
In the weeks and days prior to moving, we had to do all the necessities. We had to plan for mail forwarding and start changing addresses with various companies. We had to secure insurance on our new home. We even had the non-essential things to do like find satellite service and internet service.
We had to figure out what to pack in the truck and what to leave behind. I guess I should say, fight over what would come with us and what would come with the movers. We had very different ideas of what was essential.
There were last minutes doctor visits, prescription refills and vet visits. Last minute banking and planning. We had to cancel services at the previous house and make some minor repairs from shelving and curtain rods we took down.
It was a crazy week prior to leaving.
We did have some extremely bittersweet times before we left.
We had a Saturday afternoon cookout with the majority of Kent's family. It was great to have that time. We needed that time. Leaving family and friends was the hardest part of this move. We loved having some concentrated time before we left. We even had a chance to have a nice dinner with my little brother and his wife before we left.
On the Friday before we left, some sweet friends threw us a going away party. It was amazing. We were so surprised by the number of people who came to wish us well and say goodbye. It was humbling. I don't think either one of us realized just how many friends we had.
Much to our surprise, many of our friends showered us with love and gifts or gift cards. We set and read each card with giant tears flowing. I'll explain in one of the next posts, but the gifts and gift cards have blessed us beyond words.
Honestly, it was all of the encouragement and time we had with friends and family that has gotten us through. We know we have a huge group of supporters who are praying for us and wishing us all the best.
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