Grieving Community 2

After today, I'm convinced this subject is worthy of more attention.

I have said it over and over and over again. The people here are different.

Walking into church this morning, there was a heaviness. It wasn't spoken. You could feel it and see it in people's eyes. A seriousness and brokenness that permeated the masses.

We started off Sunday school with a discussion about where we were from, our home. One by one, each person shared where in town or surrounding counties they were from. We quietly sat listening, knowing we were the outsiders.

Leesburg is our home now, but only for eight months. Not that it was the point of the lesson, but it reinforced the understanding that this community is a family. If I had to guess, I would say that 90% or more of the people here grew up in this or surrounding communities or have lived here for 20 years or more.

As the lesson came to a close, we learned the point was that our home is heaven. Our life here is merely the vehicle to our forever home. This led to a brief discussion about the loss of the baby. As the teacher spoke and became emotional, so did most others.

There's something incredibly powerful in seeing a grown man cry. It's moving and pure. I've learned that when a man cries, it comes from deep within and is not to be taken lightly and is more unexpected.

While I watched grown men and women wiping away tears, I couldn't help but consider two things. I first wondered how much emotion was spurred by the idea that this tragic loss could happen to anyone. A loss like this can drive people to hug their children tighter and praise God for the many blessings they've been given.

The other thing was just how deeply this family was connected.

Family is a relatively new concept for me. Even my previous church family was dysfunctional at best. I have never been a part of a family who's suffered loss and felt it collectively.

What I was seeing was all new to me. People, related only through Christ, experiencing a loss as if it was their own. It was their own. A member of their family is gone.

Later on, we sat quietly in the sanctuary. We watched people hugging each other, tears and consoling.

We are a part of this family, but we aren't. We don't know these people yet. They've accepted us, but we are still outsiders. So, we've been fairly removed from the emotion, services, visits, etc. Despite our hearts desire, we haven't been around long enough, people don't know us and we don't know them. We very much have an outsiders perspective. And that's ok, for now. It's allowing us to see the integrity and strength of our church.

Once the service started today, there was a time of prayer. Again, unlike anything I've ever seen. The elder took a knee at the big wooden cross and invited the church to join him. We'd never experienced anything like this and stayed where we were. It wasn't that we lacked compassion. It happened so fast and we didn't quite know what was happening.

Most of the church filled the stage and the isles. They knelt with hands on each other. Yes, I looked. Don't judge. I wanted and needed to see how this family had come together as one. One family, one body. At that moment, they held each other.

Although I had not seen it personally, I've heard stories of how the church family had been holding each other for days.

It's a beautiful thing to see and know. These people have embodied exactly what church was meant to be. I've said it before, these are imperfect people doing church how it was meant to be. The way we were called to be a church. They've embraced what Paul has directed us to be. They love God and love each other.

In fact, it's so overwhelming that as an outsider, it's incredibly easy to not feel worthy to be a part of them.

I've heard so many stories of how this young couple have shown so much strength, grace and faith. I can't imagine. I've not been able to handle my losses that way.

Of the 10 babies we've lost, we've never held them, seen their faces and never said a formal goodbye. I know this fall, I didn't handle the two losses with anything more than struggle and questioning. I'm thankful this young couple has given this community a picture of what it's like to go through loss when your faith is strong.

This experience has certainly given us and even better understanding of who these people are in our community. It's given us a deeper respect for the strength and health of our church. And it's most definitely validated our belief that God has us in the right place at the right time.